come to our comedy show

If you perform a Google image search for "big fucking balloon," you'll get one result. This is it.

Susie got an A on her shark report!

You have rabies!

That quiz was a rip-off. I got one right and that's only because it's the one I guessed on by shitting on my monitor.

Uh, we uh, have a lot of shows coming up. We want you to come see them. Why? Oh, come on. Yeah, like--fine. Don't come. Here are the dates and locations. Please come! P#@@@@@@@

Sunday March 12th Half-hour set @ Sketch Block Sunday. 347 w36th st Btwn 8th/9th Ave, NYC
Saturday March 18th Jake @ Mortified Boston. 8PM The Tribe Theatre. $20 at the door, $15 online. Yeah so what, I'll self promote go to jerk hell.
Sunday March 19th Short-set at Hoboken Comedy night @ The Goldhawk. Hoboken, NJ
Saturday March 25th Half-Hour set in Philadelphia w/ sketch group Secret Pants More info TBA!!
Friday March 31st Forty-minute set @ the 449 Room w/ Secret Pants, Olde English
Saturday April 1st Half hour w/ our best buds SKP!! @ RiFiFi NYC

And then..
Fridays in April @ 7PM...
Cleanest River in America are: DIRT BIKE KINGS

See us @ the PIT for 8 bucks each friday at 7PM with new sketches each week.

fucking promise.

Love you guys,
Jim McKenna.

Answer time

Here they are.

1) A squash

2) Canadian (I know. Weird. Born in Edmonton.)

3) Actually the answer to this one is: "A Dickens novel." Forgot to include the correct answer in the choices...haha.

4) A squash

4) No correct answer...Also, I don't know why there are 2 number fours.

5) Emma.

6) Well, this necessitated more of an essay-type response. What I was looking for in an answer: comparing and contrasting, anger-filled dialogue, blood, the cosin graph, Jane Goodall's conscience, booting and scooting and boogieing.

7) Hmmm...I don't know.

8) Edgar! Edgar! (The question and answer overlap in this one)

9) July 9, 1816.