Halloween Costumes I will never be.

Ja Rule
Grimace
Pirate
Club Foot
Club Med
Deceit
Teri Hatcher
Ketchup
Marriage
Pirate
Enter Sandman
Robert Frost
I hate pirate costumes.
Triangle
Software
My mom

Rejected Sketches (3 of 4)

Toxic Pizza

By Jake G.

Phil
Johnny

[Phil walks in eating a slice of pizza in one hand and holding a pizza box in the other]

PHIL: This pizza is delicious!

[Johnny shoots Phil and Phil dies.]

JOHNNY: Not anymore it isn't.

ANNCR: And that was the day that pizza went from delicious...to deadly.

JOHNNY: You shut up announcer.

[Lights}

Fancy Pants Johnson

Weehawken, New Jersey!

Thanks to everyone who came out in the rain to see us at the third Empire Comedy Fest in the terribly cold hills of Syracuse New York. And thanks to our hosts Penguins Without Pants and the Wicked Wicked Hammerkatz for re-doing the Bananas in Pajamas theme song which you might find here .

Don't know when we'll be doing a show next maybe you should book us. Okay, you will? Also, does anyone know a good place for fake vomit? I really want to start carrying it around. I'm not going to use it I just want to prove to people that I'm not afraid to carrying around a bag puke. Maybe I'll fill a ziploc with alfredo sauce and shit in it. And maybe I won't. That's why you'll just have to follow me around with cameras for the rest of your life. I'm sorry if this wasn't in your plans but it now is.

Also we did a "rejected" sketch in Syracuse and it went well. So what does that prove? THE WORLD IS FILLED WITH HATE. I have a partial.

Okay, well bye.

Here is a picture of my cousin: Cousin Maroon