Poem Written by a Boy Who Just Ate a Tire

Well, I just ate a tire
A tire, yeah that's right!
I was looking for a sandwich
And was dying for a Sprite

But all we had at home
Was my father's truck
And you sure can't eat an engine
And a fan belt? Yuck Yuck YUCK!

So I settled for a tire
The back left to be precise
I heard you can sautee a tire
And then serve it over rice

Well, I ran into the kitchen,
My father's Michelin in hand!
I cooked for fifteen hours
My platter, it looked so grand!

But the first bite almost killed me
So rubbery, so dry
I dry heaved out the window
Kittens everywhere began to die

"Oh my god, the kittens!"
I screamed out to the world
My yell echoed across America
And was heard by an Inidan girl

Her name was Flying Gecko
She came soaring to me at once
I heard her voice from miles away
She told me to eat some Runts

She must have meant the candy
But I was completely out
I ate my Runts the day before
While watching a boxing bout

I accepted that I was dying
The tire had done me in
But then there was Flying Gecko
Carrying a metal tin

I could barely see her
My vision became real blurry
"Eat these," she said so tenderly
"But hurry, hurry, hurry!"

I took whatever she gave me
And dropped them on my tongue
I tasted something tangy
I laughed and then yelled "YUM!"

In minutes I was feeling better
I knew I'd see another day
"Runts are magic," said Flying Gecko
Then she turned and flew away

So now I stand here mystified
The experience seems unreal
But once again, I'm feeling hungry
This time I'll try a steering wheel